Plans

Long before my mom died, she had made it known her wishes. Everyone should be so considerate. My grandparents pre-planned and paid for their funerals as well. Mother liked to bury people in nightgowns. When my grandma became ill, Mom bought her a beautiful silk nightgown- cream with pink sweetheart roses adorning the yoke. My grandma never wore it, and it made my mom mad. When she finally mentioned it, my grandma told her that she wanted to be buried in it. As weird as it sounds, it was pretty classy. I started searching online, Marshall Fields on Michigan Avenue was gone, for the right nightgown a few years before my mom died. I had trouble finding one. I came close, but it just wasn’t perfect. My mom did not want an open casket.  The family could view her, but not anyone else. Later she went to a Catholic funeral of a friend that changed everything. This lady was cremated.  She was carried in a simple, beautiful wooden box by her son. Mother had never seen anything so classy- she just didn’t think the Catholic Church would approve of cremation. Yes- they just want the remains buried as quickly as possible. I ordered the box from the Monks who made it in Iowa. It was in my closet for a couple of years. Mom wrote her own obituary that paid homage to the nurse who helped deliver her-to a cheer they still do at our high school- to her bridge club of 40 years. Mom, we are going to have to take out a full page ad for this obituary… I let it drop. We condensed her words for the paper, but we cherish her own, handwritten one. She was cremated, and no one in the family wanted to view her body. It was cheaper to do it that way, so I told Pete, the undertaker, “That’s what we’ll do for dad too!” Now wait a minute… my dad started to protest. He had agonized over picking out my grandfather’s casket.  He chose what I would call the most beautiful casket I ever saw, but it was the “pine finish”. He just couldn’t get past people saying that he’d buried his father in a pine box. Everything about my mom’s funeral was beautiful and perfect because I knew it was exactly how she wanted it to be…